Friday, September 16, 2011

A bad space

My mum was telling me about how my grandfather's cancer is going. Apparently it is actually terminal and he probably has a couple of months left. However my dad's clinging onto some slither of hope that he's going to be OK. Mum said he's going through chemo this week and doctors are yet to say if the cancer has spread to other parts of his body.

I don't know if it's appropriate to write about it in a very public arena. The truth is, I don't want to talk about it in person with anyone. It's not that it makes me terribly sad so much as I don't see how it's really relevant to bring something like this up in conversation. I remember bringing this up during a session at the gym with my friend Karmen. I think at the time I just needed to tell someone about it.

Sometimes it strikes me how normal everything is. Eating dinner and going about our usual dinner routines seems absurdly normal, and it alarms me that we are able to be so normal. It alarms me more when we can laugh. My mum's being very 'real' about it. Or existential about it. I think it's good. I know she's sad about it, but, like me, I think we're sad for my dad more than anything else. Maybe that's how we cope with this kind of news.

Anyway, that's it. I hope the weekend cheers everyone up.

1 comment:

  1. *hugss* it seems like you guys are coping ok..that's good to hear! I reckon if doctors haven't said anything, it's still a bit early to assume anything, like I said in my other comment, my bf's grandfather's already been diagnosed over a year ago and he had chemo and everything too, it's obviously not cured but he's doing ok at the moment. Just enjoy everyday and stay happy as much as possible!